Former England skipper Lewis Moody has disclosed he has been identified with motor neurone disease and stated he cannot yet confront the full ramifications of the muscle-deteriorating condition that ended the lives of fellow rugby players Doddie Weir and Rob Burrow.
The 47-year-old, who was a member of the 2003 Rugby World Cup-winning side and secured numerous English and European titles with Leicester, appeared on BBC Breakfast two weeks after discovering he has the disease.
"There's something about facing the future and being reluctant to completely absorb that at the present time," he stated.
"This doesn't mean I fail to comprehend where it's heading. We comprehend that. But there is certainly a hesitation to face what's ahead for now."
Moody, speaking with his wife Annie, explains rather he feels "at ease" as he directs his attention to his present health, his family and getting ready for when the disease deteriorates.
"Perhaps that's shock or maybe I process things uniquely, and when I have the details, it's easier," he stated further.
Initial Indications
Moody found out he had MND after noticing some weakness in his shoulder while working out in the gym.
After physiotherapy didn't help the issue, a set of scans showed neural pathways in his brain and spinal cord had been affected by MND.
"You receive this condition identification of MND and we're rightly very affected about it, but it's so strange because I sense that nothing's wrong," he continued.
"I don't sense sick. I don't sense unwell
"The signs I have are quite slight. I have a small amount of muscle wasting in the hand and the upper arm.
"I continue to be able to accomplishing anything and everything. And with luck that will carry on for as long as is feasible."
Disease Progression
MND can advance rapidly.
Based on the charity MND Association, the disease takes the lives of a third of people within a year and over half within two years of identification, as swallowing and inhalation become harder.
Therapy can only retard deterioration.
"It isn't ever me that I experience sorrow for," commented an moved Moody.
"There's grief around having to tell my mum - as an only child - and the ramifications that has for her."
Family Effect
Conversing from the household with his wife and their canine companion by his side, Moody was consumed with feeling when he mentioned informing his sons - 17-year Dylan and 15-year Ethan - the traumatic news, saying: "It was the toughest thing I've ever had to do."
"They're two wonderful boys and that was quite heartbreaking," Moody remarked.
"We positioned ourselves on the couch in tears, Ethan and Dylan both wrapped up in each other, then the dog leapt across and started licking the moisture off our faces, which was quite funny."
Moody explained the focus was being in the now.
"We have no cure and that is why you have to be very militantly concentrated on just welcoming and appreciating everything now," he stated.
"As my wife mentioned, we've been truly lucky that the sole decision I made when I left playing was to allocate as much time with the kids as attainable. We can't reclaim those periods back."
Player Association
Top-level athletes are excessively influenced by MND, with research suggesting the rate of the condition is up to sixfold greater than in the broader public.
It is believed that by restricting the air obtainable and causing damage to nerve cells, frequent, strenuous physical activity can activate the condition in those already predisposed.
Sports Professional Life
Moody, who won 71 England appearances and traveled with the British and Irish Lions in New Zealand in 2005, was called 'Mad Dog' during his sports career, in recognition of his brave, persistent method to the game.
He participated through a fracture of his leg for a period with Leicester and once initiated a workout confrontation with team-mate and friend Martin Johnson when, frustrated, he discarded a training equipment and began participating in collisions.
After appearing as a substitute in the Rugby World Cup championship win over Australia in 2003, he claimed a ball at the back of the throw-in in the decisive phase of play, setting a foundation for half-back Matt Dawson to advance and Jonny Wilkinson to kick the victory-securing drop kick.
Assistance Network
Moody has earlier informed Johnson, who captained England to that title, and a few other previous team-mates about his medical situation, but the remaining individuals will be learning his news with the rest of public.
"There shall be a moment when we'll need to lean on their backing but, at the present, just having that type of love and acknowledgment that people are present is all that matters," he said.
"Rugby is such a wonderful group.
"I told to the kids the other day, I've had an extraordinary life.
"Even should it concluded now, I've valued all of it and embraced all of it and got to do it with unbelievable people.
"When you have the opportunity to consider your love your vocation, it's one of the most important honors.
"Achieving this for so extended a time with the teams that I did it with was a joy. And I am aware they will want to support in every way they can and I look forward to having those discussions."
